Electromechanical Timer: £1
Liking to be up-to-date with technology, he discovered this beautiful electromechanical timer amongst a pile of “£1 or less” items on the ground at the side of the seller’s car.
It is identical to the one on Ted’s 35-year-old oil boiler and will be put aside as a spare.
Ted’s mother once dreamt that her husband had a second wife. In the dream, she ended up by saying, “The fact is that you want two of everything in case one wears out,” which just about summed up Ted’s father, and this trait has obviously been inherited.
Slide Case: £1
Intelligent Ted, however, on finding the case apparently locked but without a lock or catch, immediately spotted the unobtrusive buttons on the front of the case and pushed them in to open it.
In spite of impressing the seller Ted had to haggle hard here.
When asked for the price, Ted was told £2. He gave his well-practised look of horror and put it down, whereupon the seller said, “Well, how much were you willing to pay?”
“50p,” replied cheeky Ted, but the seller refused. “75p then,” responded Ted, but the seller wouldn’t budge.
“OK, then, 99p,” said Ted, having a bit of fun.
“Well, that’s virtually a pound – OK” responded the seller, and Ted handed over a pound coin.
“Keep the change,” he said, as he walked away with a beautifully engineered box which will have as many uses as his other empty boxes.
Dangerous Book for Idiots
Now this is what the Dangerous Book for Boys should have been. That misnomer of a title was a book which covered things like the kings and queens of England, football teams and other boring and innocuous topics.
Here are some of the contents:
- Walking on Red Hot Coals
- Competitive Nettle-Eating
- Biting the Head off a Live Snake
…and so on. Get the idea?