•             Welcome

    This is the personal site of Ted the serendipitist, who has interpreted the Wikipedia definition of 'Hunter-Gatherer' (see that page) as meaning someone who visits junk shops, charity shops, antique shops and hebdomadal matutinal car boot sales in order to acquire low-value objects, which no-one in their right minds would want, at low cost (well, apart from antique shops, that is).

    Deluded Ted believes that at some time in the future, some of his acquisitions will be highly desirable and worth a small fortune.

  •       Car Boot Sales

    TYPES OF SELLERS

    There are two types of sellers at car boot sales, viz traders and ordinary people. Ted tends to avoid traders owing to the high chance of inadvertently purchasing inferior goods at high prices. However, Ted did recently manage to acquire a large number of pairs of everlasting socks at only 50p per pair.

    THE LANGUAGE

    Buyers need to understand traders' language; on asked how much the French carriage clock is, the response might be "toonarf." This would be interpreted as £250. There is no first aid on site for buyers who faint.

    WHAT ON EARTH IS THAT?

    Ted has discovered that, 99% of the time, a strange-looking object is either a massager, a fitness device or a CD rack.

    WIVES

    When a husband and wife team are selling their unwanted items at a car boot stall, it is an interesting fact that, whatever position the husband holds at work, be it dogsbody, manager or chief executive, it is the wife who wears the trousers. If someone asks the wife how much the pretty mug is, she'll say, for example, "50p." However, if the husband were asked, he would turn to his wife and say, "Er... how much for this, dear?" - even if it belongs to him.

    At other times the wife can be heard saying, "No, not there - put it on the ground here...", "You need to turn those round", "You can empty this box now..." or "You can pour me a cup of tea now - you did pack the flask as I asked, didn't you?"

    The simple fact is that women are more suited to this activity than the average man is, and so they naturally take control.

    HAGGLING

    In the early days, Ted's wife would suddenly say, "Ooh, look! They've GOT one!!!" This somewhat weakened Ted's position when he started to haggle. A more appropriate method for achieving a minimal sale price is to pick up the piece unenthusiastically and give a look of horror on hearing the price.

    Some sellers dither when asked the price of an item. At the first sign of this, the buyer should offer a very low price; there is a high chance that it will be accepted, especially if a wife is not in sight.

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Car Boot Sale – 15th April 2012


127 Dice:  £1

127 Dice

127 Dice

Yes, Ted has done it again. A selection of 127 dice for a pittance. Not just any dice, but good-quality dice, including all five platonic solids!!!

There are big dice, small dice, white dice, black dice, red dice, marbled dice, speckled dice, and there is a tetrahedral dice (or die, if you’re pedantic), an octahedral dice, a dodecahedral dice and even an icosahedral one!

Now you may be wondering why Ted would want 127 dice, but since the answer is patently obvious it won’t be given here.

Three Children’s Books:  £6

Children's Books

Children's Books

If Ted had realised how tatty these were, and that they had been scribbled in by children, he would have haggled, but they do bring back memories.

Two of the books are by Enid Blyton (Book of Bunnies and Book of Brownies) and the third, by Odhams Press is The Children’s Book of Games, Puzzles and Pastimes… but why don’t they ever put the year of publication in them? How can deluded Ted sell them at the auction house Sotheby’s if the year of publication is unknown?

A Google search indicates that the Odhams book was published c1948, the Bunnies book in 1925, and the Brownies one in 1926.

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